“Monsters” by Nidhi Zak / Aria Eipe

Nidhi Zak / Aria Eipe

MONSTERS

for Victor Valdovinos

Monsters cannot be announced. One cannot say: ‘Here are our monsters,’ without immediately turning the monsters into pets.
—Jacques Derrida

There’s a monster in the closet
a monster ’neath the bed
a monster in the torchglow
  messing with my head

There’s a monster in the lights!out!
a monster in the night
a monster through the keyhole
  numbing me with fright

There’s a monster in my comic book
a monster at the store
a monster like a shadowman
  lurking by the door

There’s a monster in the kitchen
a monster on the stair
a monster here in bed with me
  clutching at my hair

There’s a monster in the crowds
a monster when alone
a monster with his lechery
  breathing down the phone

There’s a monster in the locker room
a monster, too, at school
a monster has his eyes on me
  swimming in the pool

There’s a monster in the driver’s seat
a monster giving wood
a monster pushing into me
  straddling the hood

There’s a monster at the movies
a monster in the loo
a monster with a wagging dick
  waiting there for you

There’s a monster in the future
a monster in my past
a monster in the present, there—
  I’ve said it now, at last

from Poets Respond
February 12, 2019

__________

Nidhi Zak / Aria Eipe: “In its March 2019, The Atlantic published ‘Nobody’s Going to Believe You,’ an article detailing the outcome of a year-long investigation into allegations of sexual misconduct against Hollywood director Bryan Singer. Journalists Alex French and Maximillian Potter interviewed over 50 sources—men claiming that ‘they were seduced by the director while underage; others say they were raped. The victims [….] told us these experiences left them psychologically damaged, with substance-abuse problems, depression, and PTSD.’ One of these men, Victor Valdovinos gives a detailed account of his experience of sexual abuse by Singer, and its aftermath. Valdovinos was thirteen years old, in seventh grade, at the time it occurred—he hadn’t even had hist first kiss yet. Over the years, he started to question ‘how his life might have gone differently if not for that locker-room encounter with Singer. ‘What if he never did this to me—would I be a different person? Would I be more successful? Would I be married?’ As he watched the Harvey Weinstein scandal unfold, Valdovinos thought, ‘Me too—only I was a kid.’ He considered going to Singer’s house and knocking on the door and asking him, Why? He thought about going public. But who would believe him? This is for Victor. Because I believe.” (web)

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