November 16, 2023

Mark Jarman

ALMOST

Almost grasped what Grandmother Grace knew
Last Sunday sitting in church, almost knew
What Alexander Campbell grasped when, confronted
With the desolate orphan, he told her, “You
Are a child of God. Go claim your inheritance.”
Almost got it. There it was in the sunlight,
Squared in the clear glass windows, on the durable leaves
Of the magnolia outside. Almost grasped the weather
That turns clear and crystallized in Hans Küng’s brain.
Almost held it in the ellipses and measure
Of my almost understanding. I see the moment
There in my notebook, then the next day’s anxiety
Spilling like something wet across the ink.
I almost put in my hand a vast acceptance
And almost blessed myself, then it slipped away.
All that colossal animal vivacity—smoke
Of the distant horizon, most of it, haze.
But to have known in any place or time
What they knew is worth a record, a few notes.
Almost knew what they knew. Almost got it.
 

from Rattle #25, Summer 2006

__________

Mark Jarman: “It took me years to figure out that one of the biggest influences on me as a writer had been the fact that I lived in a house with someone who had to write something every week, get up in front of bunch of people, and basically perform it. It was my father writing sermons.” (web)

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December 6, 2021

Mark Jarman

GOOD FOR THE SOUL

      Confession is good for the soul. And suffering is good, as long as it ends. So is waiting. Toys, bread and circuses, are good. Alfresco meals with lovemaking afterwards, very good. Huge hangar-sized quiet is good, but only on paper, only there. Autobahns where fast, blinking cars blare you aside are good, very good for the soul, once you’re out of the way. Brinks and thresholds, balancing a dwindling glass for another’s thirst, these are good for the soul. And a night so dark and clear you can read by starlight is more than good. What else is good for the soul? Another soul coming close, another figment believing the stubborn illusion of time, is good. And every atom listening within a pebble where there is no time. Yes, no time, that will be good for the soul, like a long vacation. The entire void outside of space and time, where the soul is going when it retires, that will be good. So, is everything good for the soul? Yes. Everything and nothing.  

from Rattle #73, Fall 2021

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Mark Jarman: “‘Good for the Soul’ is one of a series of prose poems I have been slowly gathering for years. The form seems ideal for a parable, a fable, or a homily.”

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February 13, 2021

Mark Jarman

THE NORTHERN LIGHTS

They were all white, passing through their stages
In sheets and ladders, rivulets and falls,
White—a dream of color or an aftermath
Of color stripped to gauze and gossamer,
A white electric squall in half the sky,
Epiphany for the blind, and veils of tears.
Magdalene’s tears. The tears that Jesus wept.
What draws them forth? Mortality and laughter,
The sad and funny fact that you will die
And that you’ve made your children, they will die.
Do they hold that against you? My parents made me.
They went ahead and made me, child of love,
Child of a loving union, which would end,
But which I grew up thinking would not end.
The northern lights remind me of their love,
The drama of my growing up was love
As they performed it, everyone noticing,
The scintillating cosmic imagery
Of two who seemed to be made for each other,
As light is made for sheets of summer darkness,
As darkness in high summer accepts light.
Why did I ever think that they were gods?
But I didn’t. I thought that they were people,
And people love each other for a lifetime—
Gods are as fickle as the northern lights.
Don’t ever think of human beings you love
And need as like those shifting shimmerings,
No matter how liquescent memorable enduring
Against the immortal darkness of the sky.
The northern lights will break a heart and heal it
In the same motion, raveling and unraveling.
They are the background music of creation,
The song God sang while sinking into rest,
The song descended into, words and music,
Oblivious and yet ready to break hearts,
Heartbreaking and yet in the end oblivious.
So I have thought about a years-ago night,
The northern lights above a northern mountain,
And how the tears came down and why, forgetting
That there is nothing oblivion won’t forgive.

from Rattle #25, Summer 2005

__________

Mark Jarman: “It took me years to figure out that one of the biggest influences on me as a writer had been the fact that I lived in a house with someone who had to write something every week, get up in front of bunch of people, and basically perform it. It was my father writing sermons.” (web)

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January 29, 2015

Mark Jarman

AT THE COMMUNION RAIL

When, about to receive the Host for the first time,
I cup my hands as I was never taught
and listen to the priest describe the meaning
of the translucent disc of holy starch,
as I am lifting it, pinched, towards my mouth,
ready too for the goblet of red liquor—
a spirit speaks inside me, fiercer, stricter
than an angry parent’s rote, an old man’s voice,
outraged but with the weakness of the deathbed,
gasping and rasping in a chamber of my heart,
“What do you think you are doing? What are you doing?”
And into that same chamber, I shout back—
only I can hear this—I shout back
a response never considered for this rite:
“I’m doing this! To hell with you! I’m doing it!”

from Rattle #45, Fall 2014
Tribute to Poets of Faith

[download audio]

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Mark Jarman: “I hope that my faith is best described in my poems, but for a description of my belief apart from my poems, I would refer to the Nicene Creed. I grew up in a tradition without a creed, so now to be practicing in a church that has one, especially this one, I find particularly meaningful. The language of the Nicene Creed is moving to me simply in itself.” (website)

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