Listen up, it wasn’t that bad.
Nobody got cancer—
Nobody died of cancer—
Nobody died of cancer
While rollerskating on the moon.
Pedophiles were old news.
Santa came, didn’t he?
Somebody dressed as Santa came?
You know at that office party
We aren’t allowed to talk about?
Nobody got in bed with Putin
Without a marriage proposal.
Nobody said Stalin, Santa and Zenu
Were the three stooges.
Nobody coughed up a lung or sold a kidney
On an AirCanada flight to Saskatoon.
Nobody declared themselves a pervert
On BBC Channel 4. Nobody got the last laugh
First class. Nobody took a pee break
During the apocalypse movie.
Nobody tweeted their last words
In 140 characters full of auto-correct
Embarrassments. Nobody followed
The yellow brick road to Russia,
all roads lead to WWII
Re-enactments. Nobody shared
Fake news, wrote fake poems,
Or dressed up as Hitler. Nobody
Dressed up fried chicken from the dumpster
To look like a Kardashian to sell to
Tiny Tim. Nobody did a documentary
On Scientology or gave Tom Cruise
A lobotomy. Nobody said
When they really meant sun.
Nobody said Jihad, nobody said
Jeopardy. Nobody said
What is Facebook? Nobody got
All distraught on Twitter.
Nobody remembered that
I see dead people kid.
Nobody had monsters under the bed.
Nobody had weapons of mass destruction.
Nobody had that adolescent existential moment—
The monster under the bed is us.
Like they really meant it. Nobody voted for
Somebody they’ll vote for again.
Nobody shared fake news, nobody
Wrote fake poems. Nobody said
2016 was a year to be remembered.
Nobody wrote poems.
January 1, 2017
[ download audio]
Jill Talbot: “This is a response to the often trite way we have of summarizing up a year with platitudes or lessons learned around this time. It is also a response to the increasingly fraudulent and bizarre news out there. 2016 will be remembered.” ( link)