March 11, 2017

Makaila Dean (age 15)

DISS

Hurt is a backfiring risk
Missing someone you don’t wanna miss
Thinking about the memories you can’t dismiss
Knowing this rhyme should really be a diss
And hurt left behind like a shackled kiss
Don’t know why I keep putting myself in the same situations
Don’t know why I’m repeating myself in the same way but with different quotations
Boomeranging mistakes like I’m stuck in the same stations
Because I didn’t think
I believe why it’s so hard for me to let go
Is because I constantly see my father walking in and out the door
I promise you it just seems like he’s taking his time at the store
But I know they’re dumb in love and do but don’t wanna let go
My problem is I like to say forever
Pain in my heart only leaves it severed
Picking up the pieces broken by you trying to get it together
My thoughts for you as cold as a basement cellar
Not knowing if I can recover at all
Is Makaila just trying to stall because she doesn’t know how to move on
Momma said leave these dumb little boys alone
But did I listen? Nawl
Broke it off over text like a hit and run
You didn’t hit so I guess you thought I was no fun
Rumors spread my arms wrapped around other boys
But you and I know that was just a decoy
A scapegoat to get away
Now I’m glad you neither came back nor stayed
Your literacy was amiss
Vocabulary wasn’t at all crisp
Even if you can comprehend this rap you will see it as a diss
Missing the person who did you wrong
Feeling like you’re constantly making the same rap or the same song
Finding a piece of them in everything that comes along
Wanting everything associated with him just to be gone
All the words in my mouth taped shut and unsung
Right now I’m just too young
Starting to listen to the words that come from my mother’s tongue
Hurt is a backfiring risk
Memories leaving with nothing to reminisce
Now this rhyme is classified as a diss
Who is the dude I use to miss?

from 2017 Rattle Young Poets Anthology